Tuesday, February 2, 2010

Where Would We Be Without Heidi?

C’mon. Be Honest. You kinda love Heidi Montag. I mean, if nothing else you love to hate her. Frankly, I give her props. She has managed to stay in the spotlight for what, like 5 years now? (does anyone know why, exactly?) And just when she and good old Spencer begin to fade out of US Weekly…BAM! She’s on the cover of People, staring at you with her expressionless face (courtesy of unnecessary Botox) and breasts that are so unnaturally large they might pop out of the cover and stab you in the eyes.

Many celebrities have made headlines due to their sometimes good, but most of the time bad, plastic and cosmetic surgeries. And Heidi is certainly no exception (though is she really a celebrity? More of a famewhore, I’d say). I have guiltily developed my own little obsession with her particular case, mostly trying to figure out why in gods name would she want to do this (it’s the psych major in me). I began perusing the internet, seeing what plastic surgeons had to say about her situation, and came across a really entertaining, but still intelligent blog by a doctor from Michigan. Dr. Tony Youn had several posts about our Miss Montag, but I liked this one best.

At the end of this post, he lists the ten surgeries she had, and gives his opinion:  

Revision nose job - unnecessary. It looked fine after the first one. This just creates more scar tissue which could cause problems down the line.
Chin reduction - Why? Her chin looked good before.
Mini brow lift - stupid. Her brows were not droopy.
Botox - unnecessary in a 23 year old. She had no real wrinkles before. Now she has a "Botox brow" and looks like Cruella De Vil.
Fat injections - Not needed. She is too young to need fat grafting to her face. Unless the person has an unusually flat face, I usually consider this in the 30's at the earliest.
Ear pinning - I'm unsure about this one. It's reasonable if she had ears that stuck out.
Liposuction - ridiculous - She's too thin to need lipo. She should talk to Tara Reid.
Buttock augmentation - dumb - Heidi had a very nice derriere before the surgery. She should leave well-enough alone. She risks it becoming lumpy and uneven.
Breast augmentation revision - Probably unnecessary. Unless she had a complication or wanted to downsize, there was probably no reason to do this.

In his opinion of each, his own voice comes out. He is demonstrating that he is a knowledgeable and real doctor making valid assessments, while maintaining a funny tone. By doing so, it almost reminds the readers that this is a blog for our entertainment, and not webmd. He uses informal language, and I enjoyed his blunt responses like “dumb”, “not needed", and "stupid".

After reading this post, I was prompted to read through a lot of Dr. Youns other posts. The overall language remains playful throughout the blog. He does not get tied up in complex medical language, and writes in a conversational tone. Often, he will end the post with a question, usually a comical one, like in this post about Tiger Woods. Dr. Youn also does not use inappropriate language - he says “heck” instead of “hell”, and makes statements like: “I think that’s a load of hooey”. I don’t think I have heard the word hooey since first grade, let alone from a grown man, but it is a bit refreshing. More importantly, his use of (for lack of a better word) gradeschool lingo adds to the exaggeration he is making, and calls attention to the rediculousness of whatever he is commenting on. It establishes his character - it's like he wants us to know that he can be funny, but funny does not mean stupid.

While reading through some of Dr. Youn’s other posts, I noticed how different it was from most of the other plastic surgery blogs out there. Most other surgeons with their own blogs give reviews on new products and procedures, and keep readers updated on their practice. Instead, Dr. Youn takes a different route by encorporating his medical opinion and knowledge, with his own personality to keep readers interested. But, not all of his posts are solely about celebrity/public figures and plastic surgery. He will, in his own way, ‘review’ products as well. Here, he talks about a limp plumping product called “JolieLips":

The lips swell very easily. That's why when a guy gets socked in the kisser he gets a fat lip, not a fat chin. Because the lips are so sensitive, even a mild treatment like this one can create enough trauma to swell the lips temporarily. I suppose you could do the same thing by slapping yourself in the mouth or performing a high school-type makeout session.

Instead of arbitrarily listing the pros and cons of the product, he gives the readers a link to someone else doing it, and just shares with us his own thoughts. Instead of telling us whether or not he thought the product was worth buying, his sarcasm causes us to infer that he thinks it is, well, a bit ridiculous. By saying “I suppose”, it automatically comes off as sarcastic and jokingly, and this tone is confirmed with his comparison to a “high school makeout session”.

I will most definitely continue to read Dr. Youn’s blog, and will keep you all updated on the latest celebmetic gossip (I combined celeb and cosmetic, but it doesn’t exactly roll off the tongue, does it…)

Here are links to a few other posts I found entertaining:


Is Heidi Montag a Hero?
Dr. Youn's Plastic Surgery Predictions for 2010 Part 1 Part 2 (proof that he does not only talk about celebrity figures)
Santa Claus and Plastic Surgery?
Octomom Had a Tummy Tuck (I'm Pretty Sure) (see hooey reference) 

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